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Thursday, May 27, 2004 ( 6:55 AM ) shut up christine 1,001 Reasons Why I Don’t Play Piano No one remembers this show called Quantum Leap, besides The Wonder Years it was my favorite show back in the day and it was about this guy from the future who travels back in time to correct mistakes in the past. I can’t believe no one knows what the heck I’m talking about, man it was such a kick ass show but I digress… I don’t like pianos I hate practicing I suck at it I haven’t touched our piano in years. But why?? Hmm maybe it was the time when I was learning Christmas carols…I think I was seven or eight, and I had already been playing the piano for a couple years but I was learning from a beginner book…and when I say “beginner book” I mean you only needed to know three notes on one hand in order to play ALL the songs..yes I sucked that bad. On the day of my piano lesson, for some reason I REALLY sucked; I couldn’t even get those three notes right and I must’ve pissed off my piano teacher because she had a long talk with my Mom…I don’t know what she said but afterward my Mom shut the door and beat my ass down… with a belt AND a slipper. My teacher stopped coming :( Or maybe it’s because of that one showcase where I had the easiest piece out of all the other performers...my (new) teacher even let me take my sheet music on stage but I was so nervous that I forgot where middle C was and I played the whole song in the key of F instead of C, I didn’t stop to fix my hands I just kept playing and hoped the audience wouldn’t notice but when I got up to bow, NO ONE clapped except my Auntie Merlie and my Mom :( Or it might have something to do with the time in eighth grade when I was trying to do homework but my sis was playing a song on the piano over and over, and she wasn’t playing the song like a normal person mind you, no, she had to be dramatic and lift her hands high above her head before pounding down on the keys..basically being SUPER loud and shiet. I got fed up and told her to stop but she got even louder just to bug me, so after several futile attempts to close the piano cover on her fingers, I crawled under her seat and tried to pry her foot away from the loud pedal……..and then she kicked me in the eye… with her shoe on :(. After that, my contact didn’t fit in that eye for a couple months…I lost six contacts in two weeks, but that’s a whole other story And so we come to the year 2004. Haven’t played a piece in quite some time.......... until now I think it’s about time I did a little quantum leaping to fix those messed up memories sooooo if anyone cares (and I know you don’t) I’m having a piano recital you are invited to my house and I will ROCK THOSE beginner level CHRISTMAS CAROLS LIKE NO OTHER BOOYAH Ms. Yvonne!! So yeah, if you’re bored this summer, come to Cerritos and hang out…you can listen to me play the piano and then we can wash our cars and then get our eyebrows threaded in Little India. The end. #
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