( 9:25 PM ) shut up christine
it's the choices
rahul gave me a jyotish reading by entering details of my birth and another major life-changing event into a computer program
and apparently i'm a slutty ho!
which we already knew but at least now i can say it was written in my destiny
kidding. kind of
i got goosebumps because how could the computer know that the major life-changing event i gave was the moment in my mind when i became a "ho" so to speak, not literally, but in the sense of losing my innocence. NO, not THAT kind of innocence, but the kind where i stopped.....believing
anyway that's all beside the point. i really just wanted to post rahul's insightful words:
we're not defined by the choices that other people in our lives make, but by the choices we make with our circumstances.
you aren't made a 'ho' by what [omitted] did, but what you choose to do after learning that does say a great deal about you. there's a gujarati saying that roughly translates as 'you only know what a fruit tastes like after you squeeze it' i.e. its the difficult moments in life that show us what we're made of.
our challenges in life are the crosses we bear, and give us the opportunity to grow or to keep repeating the same mistakes and patterns until we mature enough to grow. growth requires awareness and equanimity i.e you have to know what happened/is happening, and have the presence to not be overpowered by the emotions that such awareness creates.
if gandhi had no assassin, the world would have never known that even with bullets in his chest, he could fold his hands and radiate love to his killer with his last breaths? if jesus was not crucified, how could he have said "forgive them father, for they know not what they do" at the height of his agony?
and yet to be crucified is no evidence of Christhood, and to be shot does not make you a Gandhi. its the choices...
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