| shut up christine | |
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Tuesday, April 06, 2010 ( 2:02 PM ) shut up christine process of healing i've been trying to clean my room. i have so much crap. i found another eraser in a drawer and i was like crap, i have two erasers now. who's going to want this used eraser? how many years of erasing does it take to use up an eraser? most of us can go through life with just one eraser, and now i have two. i get anxiety over it sometimes, its just so much stuff. if you need an eraser, you can have it! its white, with a paper sleeve. and one end has been used slightly. i have a desk and other stuff that you can have as well anyway while cleaning i found a piece of paper written last year, with the heading "process of healing" i'm going to put this sheet of paper in the recycling bin but i'm posting its contents here so i can look back at it later. this process was incredibly helpful to me at the time and i'm sure it will come in handy in the future how am i feeling? weak, sad, hurt, betrayed, stupid, angry, upset, like a fool, jealous, cheap, not good enough, lost, difficult to be around him, shocked, insecure what am i mourning? what do i miss? loss of friendship loss of trust we've changed how have we changed? don't acknowledge each other angry conversations i hesitate to talk to him not on same page i am hurting. i'm not okay questions: what will happen to us? how do i want to come out of this? what can i learn from this? how can i make myself better? what can i do to heal? how do i view him now? what will life be like without him? change directions when things stop making sense. discern whether you really need to stop. #
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