I have a confession of my own to make, C. I watched the whole thing straight through. But I did it without any sound; I didn't want any other influence than what I saw. I didn't expect to need any narrative or music to influence me. I was right.

I have up until very recently spent most of my work days driving through farm country. I always say "good morning" to the veal in those rotten goddamned little white shelters they keep them in here. Cute little things, and I have for many years, maybe always, refused to eat veal because somehow it seemed like an awful thing to partake in. But I drove by them for years, always saying hi, always knowing they'd be gone soon.

It's funny, but anytime I see a flock of geese, I never think of them as a flock. I might be able to talk to all of them or count them, but they always hit me as a bunch of individuals. Same thing if I see a bunch of sparrows. I'm not elitist; I love seeing them all.

I admit it: I like the taste of meat. And I can respect a family raising a pig in a pen or a cow in a field. Not saying I'd have any desire to slaughter it myself, but I can understand it.

But this video is horrible...and the reason I find it horrible is not the reason you'd think, probably. The reason I hate it is because I know a couple people who have been exposed to how these things work, and as bad as this is, it is sometimes worse than the video shows. Doesn't seem possible to me, but I've heard stories that make me cringe every bit as much as this video does, and more.

I'm not saying I am going vegetarian (and honestly, though it sounds nuts, I'm not sure plants don't have feelings and desires not to be eaten so I'm not totally sure that's a perfectly moral thing either) but I see myself leaning quite toward its direction after seeing this and thinking about things a lot. I've done it before a couple times (a long time ago; it was fine and I don't know exactly why I stopped) and I see no reason not to try to adhere to it again, and every reason to try.

I get the food-chain thing, but I think a person needs to be an active participant in that game. I have no interest in killing any animals, so it might be awhile before I join in the feast.

You have me thinking, C. Thank you!
 

thanks for your comment, m!

i, too, like the taste of meat. i grew up eating meat 3 meals a day! going home to my parents' house is sometimes difficult, especially when my old favorite dishes are staring me in the face.

thanks for sharing! :)
we could exchange meat-less recipes (but i'm a terrible cook hehe)