shut up christine | |
Tuesday, June 12, 2012 ( 12:11 PM ) shut up christine i recently ran into a once very close friend, after a long absence. he wrote me later that night, apologizing for things that had happened in the past and asked if we could be friends again one day i said no i remember a long time ago we battled it out in your car i remember thinking in the middle of this fight that it didn't have to be this way i could get out of the car and come back in and we could start the conversation over had i said yes what would our new friendship look like? do you want to be in my life now? do you just want us to be facebook friends? would it be enough for me to verbally say of course we are friends and always will be, even though in real life we are strangers? can we ever trust each other again with anything that remotely matters? just before we abandoned each other back then, i thought that if we tried really hard we could salvage scraps of our friendship. you asked, with a clarity i didn't have at the time, what would be the value in that there are sayings like time heals all wounds on a sidenote: i have a scar on my shoulder from a bug bite i got in india 5 years ago, that turned into a golf ball sized abscess, that popped and left a gaping crater. it eventually healed over with itchy scar tissue, but over the years another abscess has emerged underneath, and i'll most likely need surgery now to get it removed none of these questions are supposed to be answered. i didn't have a point when i sat down to write this, other than i just needed to write it. i'm not going to put in in a different, happier ending this is our real life it is what it is, and everything is perfect #
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