( 8:46 AM ) shut up christine
i woke up this morning angry
can i tell you? because i can't tell her now
i was already in 3rd or 4th grade maybe? i had been taking piano lessons for years, but i still sucked.
i remember it was around christmas time because i was learning christmas songs
after my lesson my piano teacher and my mom had a long talk at the front door, probably talking about how bad i was at piano
afterward my mom shut the door and beat the shit out of me
i remember it as one of the worst, maybe because it lasted so long? also because my mom always ran her mouth, screaming while belt whipping you
then she made me practice piano for hours and i wasn't allowed to cry
i hate you for that
for all the times you lost control. for your violence
for being so embarrassed about what someone else thought about me that you abused me physically and mentally "for my own good"
your fucking ego.
you hurt me, mama
i am 34 years old now and i have not forgotten this
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